


Someone To Call "Home"

by HeavenSentGohansRage



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Hacker Stiles Stilinski, M/M, Misunderstandings, Post-Break Up, Vengeful Stiles, spy!Derek
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-26
Updated: 2016-01-26
Packaged: 2018-05-16 09:38:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5823646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeavenSentGohansRage/pseuds/HeavenSentGohansRage
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Stiles take advantage of his Hacker skills to mess around with his ex, who does nothing to stop him on his part. He deserves it, after all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Someone To Call "Home"

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by a Tumblr post of a Burn Notice AU, although it has nothing to do with it at all.  
> Don't expect to find any plot here, it's mostly about... Derek's relationship with relationships or something, I dunno xD Either way I have really no idea why it took me over a year to finish this shit.  
> Huge thanks for [Drapetomania](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Drapetomania/pseuds/Drapetomania/) for the Beta (GO CHECK HER STUFF OUT! :D) and Bell J for an additional confident boost. ^^

As Derek zigzags through the dusty market’s trails of the foreign town the crowd almost blocks the path entirely and he only barely manages to move aside before he hits anyone. They stare at him angrily, and if it was not for the bullets that are shot in the air every few seconds, then they probably would not let him get through at all. He tries to turn into other alleys as sudden as he can, all while not taking too sharp turns that will lead to him driving into one of the many stalls.

He feels stupid, taking random paths by instinct alone; only he has given up by now on getting any kind of necessary direction guidance. Ever since the chase after him has started the person whose  _ job _ it is to focus his attention on the danger Derek is in- has shown a very little interest in doing so, has been talking nonsense into his ear instead.

“Did I lose them?” Derek is shouting, though there is no need to; even during a chase on a motorbike, during the busiest time of the day, the headset he wears is programed with such high technology that his voice must still be heard above all the noise that surrounds him. Even if there was some kind of malfunction, as his Hacker - who claims to be one of the best there are - Stiles can break through any technology in the common area, therefore hearing him should definitely not be a problem he cannot fix from afar.

Because when it comes to Stiles any time is a good time to get a laugh out of him, and his entertainment for this day seems to be Derek unnecessarily shouting in order to speak with him. Stiles refuses to talk to him otherwise, keeps claiming there is a problem with what Derek is sure to be the completely fine device.

_ No hidden Cameras, Derek. I don’t have a supervision ability. By the way, I liked the lack of “we” in the question. Looks like I did traumatize you enough to not want to be a partner of any kind with me, huh? _

“Stiles!” Derek growls over the bike’s own growling, ducks as a bullet flies right next to his ear.

He is pissed by Stiles’ willingness to involve his bitterness of working together as ex-boyfriends into this. It was an operation people worked on for almost a year now, struggling to receive every little detail they could get and going through any part in search for defects so many times, yet Stiles reacts to it all as if it is not only Derek’s life that is being risked.

It feels like it takes him a too long while before he finally gets away from his chasers, which costs too many almost heart-attack occurrences as he took cuts through houses he wrongly thought to be abandoned, breaking through them so he could use their second exits. His supposedly  _ fellow _ worker is not very impressed though and only complains that Derek is so far from the right exit of the little city that leads in the direction he has to head to next.

Derek grits his teeth so hard that he could almost crash stones in his mouth.

After a thankfully much more quiet drive he makes a stop in front of two heavy steel door which are stuck on a rocky mountain; the look of them is a great contrast to the almost untouched wilderness around him, and he would never have guessed he could find a secret building of a criminal organization in that area.

Stiles probably figured he would not be able to find it himself as well and that is why he had half-heartedly given him simple directions to lead him there.

But even if that time he did not talk his ear off, there was still not enough information or instructions based on the newest intelligence that was being collected regarding the enemy’s recent acts. Derek kept quiet the entire way, not risking being left on his own on the roads with Stiles’ rage- quitting his assistance, but now there was no way he could let himself ignore it anymore.

“Are you still gonna keep the line dead?” He keeps his voice loud even after shutting down the engine.

_ Hearing you loud and clear, buddy, now that you’re off of the bike. _

“You fragile ears will have to forgive me for speaking loud as a result of being annoyed by you.” 

The main door is opened for him - cleary Stiles’ job of breaking in from afar - and Derek does not approve of how he gets suspicious on Stiles' intentions to let him in so easily.

_ Oh, poor little Derek got irritated. I must have been doing something seriously bad then. I’d feel bad, really, if you didn’t make it so easy. _

“Shut up and help me break this code,” Derek stands in front of the door which, according to the map he memorised, leads to a lab of illegal medicines.

_ Say Derek, just out of pure curiosity, have you ever wondered how you would survive on your own? You know, in a scenario where even the best set of headsets in the world stops getting any signal, and you don’t have me to help you anymore? _

Derek almost lets a crooked smile find its way onto his lips; every time he complains about Stiles’ work recently, his retort is to question Derek about his importance for the successes of the assignment, so-called softly reminding Derek of his need of him. It is only not-very-subtle subtext to the real question which Derek has yet to give him the proper answer for, although that was not a conversation either of them were ready to start or do anything more about than talk through hints.

A short moment later, there is suddenly a noise of people moving towards his direction, which should be a sign for Stiles to stop wasting time with his indifference towards the mission- only he does not say a word, as if nothing happen to alarm any of them.

“I hope you plan on finishing with your criticism on my spying abilities soon, because they’re coming, Stiles, I can hear them. Something  _ you _ should have noticed way before me for sure.”

_ Nah, you’re fine. You still have time. _

“They’re too  _ close _ for me to have time, Stiles! Give me the fucking code!”

_ It takes you about 1.34 seconds to punch in the code - yeah, unfortunately it’s part of my job to know that detailed stuff - so considering you have about... 13 seconds ‘till they break in? Plus the for the door to - _

“Are you insane?!” The sound of them getting closer is loud enough for Derek to match the tone of his voice to it, forgetting for a moment the argument he had with Stiles about how it was unnecessary to speak loud.

It turns out to be the victory Stiles has been looked for.

_ 1345\. And do it quick, because they definitely heard that shout.  _

Derek pushes the door aside with the entire force he can use at that moment, adrenaline runs fast inside his veins- only to freeze in his spot as he observes the room, which is  _ definitely _ not a lab, or anything similar he could hope for.

What  _ is _ inside, though, is a huge office, with a man sitting behind the desk on the other end of it and smiling pleased with himself. Surrounding him, and at too-many more points around the room, some standing and some crouching- are armed men, every single one of them points his weapon towards Derek.

A trap; one Stiles should have easily called for.

Derek walks in, knowing better than to try to run away from the scene, and lets the door shut behind him. In slow movements, he puts both of his hands over his head.

“What a pleasant visitor we’ve got here,” the man’s voice matches his joyful face, “although it looks like I’m not what you were looking for.”

_ Oh yeah, I forgot to mention those guys too. Not that it matters anyway, what with you being all about getting through the door already. _

“I bet you expected to find the lab in here,” the man continues through some of Stiles’ words, and Derek hopes he indeed is not aware of his earbuds, “looks like we did a good job in leaking the wrong map of the building.”

_ Not really, you don’t have to be Sherlock to know it’s fake right from the first glance at it. Nothing made sense in it. _

“You knew even be - “ Derek snaps and shuts himself up quickly, his anger almost makes him forget the situation he is in.

“That you’re coming?” luckily it seems the man thinks Derek talked to him- not that it matters anyway, now that it has been revealed that the one in his transparent headphone has knowingly sent him to his death, “Of course I did. Who do you think sent my guys to chase after you?”

“Yeah, seems like I was foolish after all, to follow so blindly after instructions,” Derek commented, both to the man and Stiles- but mostly to himself.

_ To say the least. At least you finally learned your lesson. _

Derek wants to reply that it looks like it is too late for any lesson to be learned anyway when the man in front of him speaks again. “Now it seems we face a little dilemma, Agent. Do we keep you for negotiation or put you out of you misery?”

Derek almost chokes over the lump in his throat. The only man in the world whom he cherishes more than anything, even more than his work which he is so addicted to, has turned from sharing with him the most soft looks - so soft it physically ached him how much he does not deserve it - to intentionally lead him into a trap. 

Whether Stiles was overreacting about being dumped by him or not, it does not matter, because knowing he made someone so relaxed about him being in a life danger situation speaks for itself.

_ They're on their way, by the way. The others, I mean. Just keep talking to him, they'll be there in twenty seconds. _

Derek does not care to debate with himself anymore on whether Stiles is serious right now or is just playing mind games with him until his very last moment, as there is no point anyway. He does not even have much to fight for.

Because he may be a complete heartless being for using his job to get back at Derek by sending him to his death, but  _ of course _ Derek is being so ridiculous as ever that even  _ then _ he cannot find it in himself to hate him for it.

Maybe that is just the destiny that people like him get, after not letting their loved one experience the huge love that is in them for them, which the other one deserves more then anything to get.

“If I got in, you don’t have a lot of time until the rest comes after you as well,” Derek smiles at the man bitterly, “You’re better getting rid of an unnecessary burden.”

The man smiles back. “Very well, then.”

As the other guys in the room load their guns, pointing at Derek- Stiles freaks out in his ear.

_ Derek? What the fuck, man?! That's not how you gain time, you know better than that! You're- you're not serious, right? _

Stiles' voice is shivery, almost worried, which makes no sense- only a moment ago he sounded more than happy so send Derek to his sure death, darkly as amused as that time he discovered his tickly spots.

At any other moment he would ache at the memory of it, how he used to be so irritated by Stiles' childishness, while somewhere deep inside of him he was actually glad to be a little less serious for a chance, even just so he could listen to Stiles' beautiful laugh of pure joy- but the present was too bizarre for him to be able to lose himself in that like he usually does. 

Does Stiles regret it because he suddenly realized he still needs him for some reason?

“Why do you look surprised all of a sudden?” Derek barely pays attention to the man’s words, “Did you expect me to reject your prediction? I’d tell you you should be careful with the choice of your words - “

_ Duck, NOW! _

“ - But I - “

Derek touches the ground just as the wall behind him explodes, his hands which are put over his head quickly get covered with scratches and bruises. 

The headset locks tightly in his ears, blocking the deafening noise- something that could be activated only by Stiles, which surprises him more than the sudden turn of events, as Stiles actually  _ cared _ enough of his responsibility to protect Derek’s hearing.

Luckily, he is exercised with working under a great shock, and after hitting the ground he quickly turns to deal with finding an escape from the mess of bullets flying above his head. It is over shortly after he is able to drag himself to the safety of behind the firing line.

Once he stands up, patting his dusty clothes- Scott, one of his long-known Co-Agents, comes to greet him, eyes too lighted after the showdown that has happened only few moments ago.

“Man, I thought you didn’t get the message!”

Derek gives him a questioning look.

“You didn’t leave a mark that you got it, but then you lead this race to the very depth of that town before you finally found the rest of the way to here- so only then we figured eventually that you were buying time for us. How did you manage to lose those who were after you so quickly, though?”

_ Luckily for him, at least ONE of us bothered to go over the maps of the whole area instead of only the way we’re supposed to go through. _

“Stiles!” Scott exclaims cheerfully as he apparently was connected to their line. Derek has to hold back the need to roll his eyes at Scott doing this ridiculous motion of attaching his Bluetooth Handsfree closer to his ear when the sound is way too clear to need do it, “What’s up, man? It’s been  _ years _ !”

_ Oh no, don’t remind me how many times I had to live through that agony ever since we both got promoted, when you decided to abandon me for Kira’s sake, and got me stuck with Mr. sour-ass over here. _

“Funny you could use the map, I thought you said you didn’t have security cameras to know where I was,” Derek easily ignores the nickname, but almost winces at the mention of this particular area of his body. 

Stiles was always willing to express his obsession with it with particularly anyone who had functional ears. Funny enough, that was what made Derek feel the sharp reverse in their relationship, as happened on the day Stiles noted how Derek did not deserve owning such a marvelous piece of perfection while having such an repulsive personality.

_ That town really was too godforsaken to have any kind of cameras I could use, but you have enough tracking devices attached to you to let me know where you are at any giving time. Don’t be let down by me that easily, Derek. _

“Nothing to be let down by, I simply don’t trust you,” Derek leads both of them out of the room so they will not interfere anyone with their talk, “you don’t draw my attention to a message about a critic turn in the mission that I should have gotten, which could ruin the entire plan because there was nothing left to prove to them I saw it`  _ then  _ you don’t agree to direct me through the town so I wouldn’t get too lost in it, and,  _ on top _ of all that, you almost sent me to my death. Not sharing with me everything you know is one thing, but I seriously don’t know why I haven't reported on you already for playing around when my life is on the line.”

_ I do play around with you, I admit, but you can’t blame me on any of that! I couldn’t see where they left you the message, but I got it through my systems and that’s how they knew you received it as well. Then, in town, I really could not do anything more than follow you, I can’t see what's going on around you or you. The backup wasn’t far from you and I knew you’d be better to keep going with the plan of being used as a bait so they will not think of focusing on anything else but you, that was the point of the whole thing after all. What we should talk about INSTEAD is your over-martyr ass almost getting yourself killed in the name of god-knows-what. _

“I don’t give a shit about your excuses,” Derek snaps, “You either get your crap together and let me know of  _ any _ single change in the plan and  _ give me _ help me when I need it, or you return right back to work with random Beta Agents.”

Even while snapping it all at Stiles, Derek knows he will not report at any of these things. Mostly because he knows just how much he needs Stiles to perfect his skills, but also, shamelessly, because he cannot entirely let go of him.

Not as long as he does not let go himself, that is.

_ Ooh, I love it when he threatens. Those are the kind of thrills that made me get this job in the first place- empty promises by someone who talks about his feelings only when he gets to his peak. Sometimes by fear of death, sometimes by not admitting in time on another fear of commitment. _

“If you have to talk about it, can I at least get off of the line?” Scott cuts in, wincing a little.

_ Oh, I’m sorry, Scotty. I was so into it I forgot you’re still with us. Don’t forget to keep in touch, Kira is not an excuse! _

Scott looks incredibly relieved once Stiles drops him out of the line, and goes back inside. It surprised Derek at first to see Scott treating him the same after the extreme change in the attitude of his best friend towards him, but it seems Stiles does not exaggerate in the description of the great luck of contact between them after all. Derek knows exactly just how much that job makes it almost impossible to keep in touch with anyone on the outside world, but  _ of course _ neither that logic nor the breakup, which was initiated by himself- prevented him of hating Scott a bit for not being there enough for his good friend.

It is then that Derek notices that Stiles got himself off of the line as well, and Derek does not hear anything else from him the rest of the day.

Derek knows that he learns the data of capabilities from inside out - his limits, his weaknesses, how he reacts to specific stimulus, where he needs help and when he can get along on his own - and therefore Stiles only plays games with him when he is one hundred percent sure Derek is not in a situation he cannot get himself out of mostly by himself. And still, it is not a reason to mess with him just for the sake of seeking revenge instead of just asking to have another partner.

They both knew they took that risk when they had started it, but Derek seriously believed it would not get to such a low point, and even then that Stiles might be cold but still enough of a grown up to not make a game out of him.

Yet it is not that easy to be attached to another person- knowing you perfectly when it comes to dry details on a paper is not what would make you a great team necessarily. Derek has already experienced it with other Hackers he worked with- some of them were good as Hackers, but did not connect to him by a level of instinct like Stiles. The reason he lets himself not fight against his ADHD except if trying to sit in his chair for hours - or sometimes even days - is because they both trust him to cover Derek up with a very minimal communication, so optimal that Derek agreed to stick with him after a few missions, no matter how he wished for the silence his previous partners provided.

There is no question he misses those times- the quality of how well they worked together as a duo is still there, but there is a big link missing, the one that connected them more than anything.

Derek does not have a flat to return to, he does not have the time to take care of it- and in the cheap motel room it is a little bit more easy to overcome the lack of signature voice which used to accompany him for a long time after the mission was over.

-

It had taken a long time before Derek got to this point of not denying his approval of Stiles-  they first paired during tryouts of working together in the Agency’s training area, in a period when Derek was even more short-tempered than usual after spending too much time in trainings although he was an Alpha-level Agent, too impatient to finally find a normal Hacker. It did not avoid Stiles to hold even a little bit his annoying remarks and ramble about nonsense more than talk about what they actually did, and the only reason Derek agreed to work with him was because something worked there more than it did with others, and he was too sick of not going to missions.

The first time they met in person was when they had a meeting to go through the details of their first mission together. He stood in the lift, lost in thoughts about his hope to get an interesting, long-length case when someone poked him in his ribs. He turned around to meet a pair of big, golden eyes smiling at him, their amused gaze being adjoined with a close, bitten lipped smile that altogether completed the smug look- but even that did not prepare him to the discovery of who he was.

It surprised Derek when the guy eventually introduced himself as no other than Stiles, since he always imagined him as a neglected, short and overall normal-looking guy- not a mole-covered, long-limbed and ridiculous beanie and glasses wearing guy. The hipster look matched his irritating personality, when he came to think about it- only above all he was also  _ smoking hot _ .

They did not have much time to talk since they were in a hurry to the meeting which started shortly after they arrived. When Stiles stayed to talk with one of the attendees at the end of it, Derek took the chance to get out of the building as fast as he could, telling himself it was to be able to stay away from him when he had a chance to escape his endless chatting. He was afraid of losing control and Stiles annoying him would cause just that

With every mission they had together, the man behind the voice which annoyed him so much (yet lead him into places much better than his past hackers, but he would never let Stiles the satisfaction of knowing that) drove him to the edge more and more, but since he never made mistakes Derek could do nothing except mutter angrily about it here and there. The real problem was, though, the meetings when the saw each other, where Stiles always strictly sat on the opposite side of the table, right in front Derek. When asked, Stiles claimed they could barely stand each other when not being face to face, so it is for the better of both their nerves to not sit next to each other- but Derek could feel Stiles sneaking a glance at him when he was not even speaking, as if he did not have enough with seeing Derek every day through the security cameras he broke into for him.

Only it lead to Derek to be tempted to have a chance to have a better look at him too. And so later on, during missions, sometimes when Stiles talked he would imagine this cute, pink, perfect cupid's-bow mouth; whenever he typed a code for hi and decoded the buildings' structure, he could not delete from his mind the picture of those thin, shamelessly long fingers. Those thoughts did not help him ignore the nonsense Stiles was bubbling into his ear during missions when he was bored or those stupid sarcastic remarks on people Derek communicated with- but it also did not exactly work in the other way.

One time, after a little bit more than a year that they had been paired together, Stiles would nonchalantly comment that their next mission would place not far from him, just a two hours long driving.

“Good, now when you fall asleep at the middle of a mission- they’ll actually have a chance to come rescue me,” Derek responded, half joking half serious. Nothing happened when Stiles was out of watch, but it still was a serious thing since Derek counted on him more than anything.

_ Dude, I told you only a hundred times I’m sorry! I swear I took, like, five cups of coffee an hour to stay awake that long, and it still didn’t help. _

“Nothing can assure you counted right if you were so tired.”

_ I bet the guy who made the coffee machine was so tired himself that the coffee was made without the actual caffeine in it. _

“Or maybe you just insist to settle with cheap coffee. If you ever tried to get out of your building once in a while, you may be running into this good coffee shop not far from your building. If it means the success of the mission is at stake, I’m taking you there myself once the mission is over.”

There was an intense silence for a few moments, as Derek slowly came understand what his sarcastic suggestion might had sounded like to someone like Stiles, who tended to take jokes seriously and probably believed it was serious the more Derek stayed quiet.

He had enough stretched seconds to huff or saying on a second thought that Stiles should go there by himself, but he somehow did not have it in him to take it back, whether it was said as a joke or not. He knew very well where it may lead them too, how much their dangerous it was for the sake of their good combination to let Derek be near Stiles more than necessary, but he could not find words to take what he had said back to where he took it from.

Then Stiles' voice finally came out of Derek's headsets.

_ Yeah, sure, as long as you buy it for me. It may be your job to trust me with your life, but you should know that the only reason I risk taste buds for you is because I owe you for not reporting on me. _

“So much for owing me,” Derek muttered, not really sure what he got himself into, but trying to convince himself it cannot be anything further than two workmates having a cup of coffee together. It could be turned out as a healthy move for them, making their connection stronger. No reason to worry over just how frustrated Stiles made him feel, right?

And so the meeting happened after all. Derek found himself listening to Stiles' non-stop bubbling about everything and anything, his hands moving all the times like if it was as necessary in order to communicate as the movement of his mouth; while talking face to face he was even more impossibly annoying, laughing at how Derek loves his coffee and leaving so-called gentle hints on how he was approved of some Derek's body parts. He was now without his beanie or glasses, both being replaced by an equal idiotic amount of hair gel. 

Everything about him irritated Derek and drove him insane the more he got to know him, and he definitely let him being aware of it- yet it was partly because Derek wanted to keep it all to himself, impossibly finding everything more endearing than anything. Never in his life he had thought he would love sitting in a coffee shop and just chat for a few hours, but he never thought even once on checking the time. He  _ wanted _ it to end as soon as possible, but not for the right reasons.

When Stiles eventually had enough of sitting down, he insisted to walk Derek back to his hotel room. He kept accompany him even after reaching the building and getting to the lifts, and when they reached the right level- they found a room service guy standing by the room’s door, looking at them impatiently. Stiles would explain later that he had broken through the phone line of Derek’s room - once Derek told him the name of his hotel and his room number on the way there, without telling him why he was asking it for - and used it to order the meal, as it was all at the expense of the agency’s money.

Derek, secretly a little impressed yet not ready to show any if it, rolled his eyes- something he had wanted to do in reaction to Stiles’ stupidity for a long time, only until now had not had the chance to do so with Stiles being able to see it.

After eating almost the entire food on his own, Stiles sprawled on the bed in a starfish pose, barely leaving space to Derek, as if it was the bed  _ he _ was the one to lay on later that evening and sniffing the hair gel’s smell through the entire night.

But as his shirt kept raising up a little more every time he raised his hand while keeping babbling on and on, enough skin was revealed to make Derek forget all about any hair gel.

Normally he was against mashing between personal life and work, but just how great were the chances that Stiles would last with him, especially as such clever and successful Hacker, who could allow himself someone more sympathetic than Derek, someone who would let himself to laugh at his jokes?

He suddenly found no reason to wait until he reached Stiles' stubbornness limit to keep sticking with him finally asking to replace him with someone else, just like everyone had done. It also was not like making another Hacker being fed up by him was going to get him burned; he was involved in too many successes operations, after all, to be thrown out of the agency just because he cannot find a Hacker that would deal with his seemingly problematic personality. 

And so, as the night fell, they both came into a decision that Stiles was better off sharing the bed with Derek after all.

-

"I have to talk with you."

Because even while being pissed to the degree of crush the life out of someone- Derek also wishes at the same breath he had someone to hold onto, so he would feel a little more stable in the swaying helicopter he is currently in.

The aircraft is remote controlled by Stiles, who makes if it feel like a dysfunctional automatic pilot mode, although he is more than capable of fly it straightly in the very clean whether. Derek sits on the pilot sit, but even the seatbelt is not helpful as the vehicle keeps moving jerkily and tending too sharply to the sides, and Derek holds the unmoving wheel just to get hold of something.

_ You? Talk? Geez Derek, I'm flattered. Do you mind wait a few minutes? Gotta call CNN, no way something like that happens without we organize a news crew first. _

"Funny," Derek hisses through clenched jaw.

_ Oh, no, wait a minute. It's a prank, right? Must be. I always knew Ashton Kutcher will make his comeback for me. _

"Stiles."

_ Oh yeah, I forgot you asked to do the talking thing. Here, I'm shushing myself from now on so you can speak. Good luck, by the way. I know it's a big deal for you. _

Derek releases a frustrated breath. "Stiles, we can't keep working like that if we don't keep it professional."

_ Oh, I keep it professional alright, don't even worry about it. How do you think you're safe and sound in the helicopter right now instead of being stuck, half-naked, on an isolated island with barley fresh water and used coconuts?  _

“Being professional is to put whatever feelings you have against me as long as we’re at work, I believe that was also the same condition that was written on the contract you signed on.”

_ What are you so afraid of? You are the one to sign the report execution, you can make them sue my ass off. You even know where I live as good as me; know exactly where to find me if I’m not there. Yet you’re not use any of this, because you know any of what I do to you cannot repay for that bullshit you threw at me that day. _

Derek closes his eyes, lets the ache of his heart at the sadness in Stiles’ voice to consume him.

Stiles does not deserve to feel any of it, but it is nothing compared to how much he does not deserve someone like Derek.

If only he did not get that much into Stiles’ life.

_ I'm not a very romantic kind of a guy, but dump someone in Paris? Dick move, dude. _

The sincerity in Stiles’ voice is one that Derek has not heard for a long time now, a continuous trust in him to not use his vulnerability and hurt him through it.

It always made Derek being scared of it more than grateful, not that he can let himself believe he should see it at the other way. It cannot possibly hurt as the feeling of Stiles’ laughing at his ridiculous attempt to be romantic with him, as he would have if Derek completed the gesture after all. 

That not to say that Derek could care less when his choice of acts caused Stiles instead to shed so many tears, because Derek has a natural talent to be such a failure.

He knew doing anything with Stiles could come in the way of their work- he just has never thought it would affect Stiles that badly, and that is the only reason he feels something close to regret.

What exactly that regret is about, though, he cannot tell for sure.

-

During the following three years since the night they had spent together for the first time, they would keep meeting whenever the work let them, which with time it turned to be an obvious thing for both of them that Derek would stay at Stiles’ flat. They never talked about it during missions; neither behaved differently nor confirmed in some other way that it was official- though they both knew the other one was not seeing anyone else or had an intention too, and not just because of work.

Derek coming to Stiles’ place during his free days became such a normal thing, that one time Stiles even asked him to get groceries before he would arrive at his place.

"So two milk, eggs and...?" It was awkward, using the headsets for such a normal activity as shopping at the supermarkets. It may be weird to have this discomfort about something so average, though he had never imagined himself in a situation where he uses it in public during his off time between missions.

It did not help that some people, who had noticed him talking while having while the bluetooth is too well hidden, give him my weird faces. There were even those who had the dignity to cross by him at a so-called nonchalant manner just to check his ears.

_ And don't forget the frozen chicken nuggets, those with the ice tea added! _

"Shouldn't you keep an eye on your diet more as the one who spends most of his time on a chair?”

_ Nah, you know me. My ADHD is good for one thing and it's that it always keeps me moving. _

"That’s not the point. When was the last time you checked your cholesterol and sugar levels?

_ Aw, look at you, all worried about me. _

Derek rolled his eyes at the cooing. “If one day your dysfunctional health would put our job at hold - “

_ Don’t worry, the guys here are way too aware of all this agenda healthy revolution bullshit, they won’t let something like that happen. Hey, did you notice though how you said it was OUR job? _

Derek did not notice, in fact, and it worried him how naturally it was slipped out of his mouth.

Yes, they were teammates, of course they had some sort of  _ theirs _ \- but Derek never felt right to refer to it like that with other people he worked together with.

But if he had to be honest with himself-

They had a thing. A weird thing, but undoubtedly a  _ thing _ . It even got to the level of  leaving-an-extra-toothbrush-at-the-other-one's-house. It probably has something to do with the fact that Derek had moved between motels so frequently because of his job that he did not see a point in owning a flat with a permanent toothbrush of his own, and Stiles tried to let him have a sensation of home as much as he could.

But Derek knew it was more than that- as Stiles was so versed at his files, he was definitely aware Derek had used to have a big family, who he lost to a fire at their that took them all, leaving him alone in the world aside an uncle in a coma. Derek did not want to learn how to live in a house that would never be filled with the noise he used to live with his entire life.

But whether he came to a conclusion about that as well or not, Stiles is naturally all about making too much more  noise than one person should make- the only times he actually shut up is when he flailed over an unlucky piece of furniture, sometimes even broke the poor thing, and made mess almost as bad as the one him and his siblings and cousins used to make at their home. This guy was completely ridiculous, and Derek knows he will never find anything better than him.

At any rate, this thing - no, not a thing, but a  _ relationship _ ; it would be stupid to call it anything else - was nothing close to be stable, though. They barely having time to actually being with each other or spending time out of work, but Derek could never ask for a better way to be with someone with his impossible schedule- before Stiles he had been sure it was a lost case at all; and the more the time passed, the more he understood he could not imagine doing it with someone else expect of Stiles anyway.

Then came the point where Derek noticed it developed into something deeper: to go somewhere public was an unpleasant task for Derek, but with time he found out it was hard for him to refuse to Stiles’ excited look when he talked with anticipation of what was shown on the big screen. Furthermore, at one particular time, when Stiles "dragged" Derek to go out to the cinema - comics related, obviously - Derek surprised himself by being disappointed for having to sit instead of cuddling with Stiles- a habit they had just started to have while watching Netflix together at Stiles’ little sofa. Then, once they went out of the theater, as Stiles was enthusiastically talking about the film- Derek found himself looking for Stiles' hand to hold without even thinking about it; only before he managed to back up- Stiles caught his palm with his own, squeezing it lightly. The smile he sent to Derek was so full of fond, that if Derek did not know him- it could be considered as a shyly one.

There was no name-calling or buying flowers for each other, but there was no need to- when he brought Stiles one time a rare Star Wars' collectibles item (his eyes had caught it as he had wandered inside a target's house, and after the raid he asked to buy it after the whole criminal’s property was nationalized), he knew the look of admire in Stiles' eyes would not be as strong with any other traditional romantic gesture.

It was perfect, but once Derek decided they should take things one step further, he knew they had to break this not-doing-any-coupley-thing habit, even if just for the proposal. He had to show Stiles it was not only serious - which it undoubtedly was, considering how they kept it going for years now without fighting for real even once - but also somewhat  _ normal _ enough. He had ran away from normality ever since the fire, but he knew he had to sacrifice his comfortable zone and give Stiles just that if he wanted them to last, even if it meant to officially settle down after years of living on the roads.

Then they decided to take a two-weeks vacation to go on a trip in West-Europe. As much as they were addicted to their job and were more than happy to spend most of their time on it, they found out they needed that break more they believed they would ever feel, so they could have this continuous time together. They had the fun of their life, utilizing the most of every day, and more than all- it made Derek confident even more than before that this was it. The little box felt heavy in his pocket.

The Eiffel Tower was almost empty that day: it was only the two of them and a small group of guided tour on its second floor, the weather was nice and the sunset was beautiful on the view of Paris. The remaining light made Stiles' eyes shine gold as he was leaning on the railing, taking in the view. He was silent for once, which gave Derek the time he needed to take in the view of  _ him _ and appreciate what they had.

Obviously this was the moment he also came to realize he was about to fake himself as someone who could promise Stiles the normality of a married couple for years to come, and instead of losing sense of his tongue like he thought would happen, words came out of his mouth pretty smoothly.

"I think we should end this.”

-

Derek does not have to report on Stiles, after all, as a few days after the latest mission, during the comprehensive discussion of the operation- there are already hints for separating the two of them for good, despise their great success together. 

Whether it was Stiles to be the one to finally report on their recent dysfunctionality as a duo or not, Derek forces himself to not care.

-

As if it was the moment they have been waiting for- Stiles’ tracks are lost only some weeks afterwards, and one of the best agency’s Hacker is reported to being taken hostage.

He is asked whether he wants to take a part of it or not, considering how Stiles has mistreated him the last couple of months.

Derek is  _ that close _ of ripping someone’s head off, and even without replying, his point is well clear.

They join him with Kira, as she is the closest suitable Hacker to take the job of working with him. He finds it almost impossible to listen to her, though, this time preferring trusting on his own instincts, on Stiles’ voice in his head messing with him on which route is the best to take, but Derek is well familiar with him now to always recognize the hint in his tone.

Right before the showdown, Derek’s hand start to shake; too much fear to do the wrong move that will lead him to fail.

It is the first time Derek’s heart slams inside his chest with any kind of emotion, that the blood pumping through his veins feels vital and not muddy.

_ Worry. Frustration. Anger. Guilty. Helplessness. Apprehension. Hankering.  _

_ His home being taken. _

He could give a name from the latter because he experienced that feeling before, but he could not let it happen again.

He takes a big breath

-

Those bright, gleaming eyes, that warm his stomach with too much pure  _ happiness _ .

Those dilated pupils, which scan his body and Derek can never say no to them.

And those moments and Stiles just  _ stops _ , cut off both of them just to take that moment to observe him,  _ takes him in _ .

No matter how painful it is to think about someone else having this, he is not about to let those fuckers prevent from it to happen.

-

He has a lot of those kind of dreams, being shown of what he is about to lose for good, all full of frustration as the dream does not let him to actually  _ do _ something about it.

He is surprised to find out they put them together at the same hospital room. Derek tries to fight his vague vision and limped body as he struggles to get off of his bed and check on Stiles, but a nurse is soon to come to lie him back down with embarrassingly not much endeavor.

The next time he wakes up he is in a much better shape, but someone else is being put at the bed Stiles used to be on.

After being told that he was released with minor damage, Derek’s body decides for him where to head next, as his mind is too full of thoughts of the rescue operations, and of how he cannot any longer lose contact with him again, even if it means for Stiles to get stuck with him forever in his life.

The keys to the flat still fit, surprisingly. The unlocking sound seems to finally bring him back to his senses, understanding he does not really have the right anymore to freely enter the place. At the same time it feels too weird to knock, though, so he decides to simply text him.

The affirmative reply is received much faster than he imagined, and Derek is almost sure he hears a snore coming from inside at his phone,  which he forgot to silence and ranged awkwardly too loudly. At least now he cannot let himself chicken out.

He finds Stiles frozen on the opening which connects between his kitchen and the hall, standing still at his place after seemingly walking back and forth, not moving a muscle.

What if that is how he wants to behave for now on? Ignoring Derek's present entirely?

Derek swallows, not being able to recall being that nervous even during the majority of his most stressful missions. "Stiles?"

The man in question turns around; his eyes is as broken as the last time Derek has seen them a few months ago, only this time they are not watery and hurt, but full of worry and hope.

Derek expects a bitter comment or even shouting- but instead Stiles wordlessly gets closer to him, quickly closes the gap between them and collides their lips.

The kiss is not very passionate, but hungry and desperate with longing; Stiles whines, his palms are firm on the sides of Derek's face, whose own arms cover as much as possible of Stiles' body. They do not make it deep, trying to remain at more or less control and not lose themselves into it, and so are able to fully experience the moment with their senses, every little detail of it is sucked in.

It screams more than all of how Stiles did not want to stay with him just because it was fun, and was not hurt just because Derek broke-up with him so suddenly and out of nowhere. He have seen Stiles wearing expressions which already told him this, but it is a complete other thing to being told this so...  _ close  _ and  _ clear _ . 

Derek vaguely remembers why he tried to separate them and avoid himself of having it- but the taste, the touch of Stiles, only being so near him like that makes him deny to listen to any logic, even that of himself. It is that effect that Stiles has over him that whatever they had continued for so long.

Once the kiss is over, Stiles' hands are resting on Derek's shoulder and the side of his neck, while Derek's are still surrounding Stiles, and both of their foreheads lean against each other.

Derek is the only one of the two of them to have his eyes open, and they dart up and down over Stiles' face, over and over again; drinking in the look of Stiles' pale, mole-covered skin, the long lashes and pointed nose. 

Derek has a lot of achievements in his spy career to be credited for, but none of them satisfies him as much as Stiles letting him to have him in his arms again.

And it is all weird, because since when he looked forward to it that much, carved to Stiles being close to him so badly? Years of being on his own, barely seen not fakley friendly face- and while reunioning with Stiles at last, he felt relief releases that tense he held in his chest the entire time - one of loneliness, out of all things;  _ yearning _ \- and he never had the courage to admit to himself of having. He was about to propose Stiles without truly realize how much important he is to him.

"I knew you were stupid even before I agreed to have this," Stiles says as his breaths are finally even again, caressing the hair in the back of Derek’s neck, "so I forgive you. But you still have  _ a lot _ to make up for."

Derek hums into his hair, nuzzling through it. It is itchy and tickles and not very soft, but it is  _ real  _ and he could not wish for anything better.

"You owe me, big time. I even have a vision of how you may repay me."

Derek raises his eyebrows, even though Stiles cannot see it. "Is that so."

Stiles hums back in agreement. "You’ll take me to the best restaurant in town, then a super cheesy romantic walk in the park, then a ride on a love tunnel in a festival nearby… All while wearing nothing but your boxer.”

The scary part is that, after all that Stiles has made him to go through recently- it would not be that surprising if it turns out that Stiles honestly expects all of these.

Derek's jerks his head sharply so he meets Stiles' amused gaze. "You're not serious."

"You made me embarrassed myself in front of everyone who were there, Derek. It's only fair if we make you go through the same experience as well."

Derek lets go of Stiles and looks away. He now knows that he is so gone on Stiles to ever again be afraid of romance him, but first Stiles deserves to know the truth. He has no 8dea why Stiles agreed to have him back so quickly, but he cannot let him think it was Derek being too fed up by him that he needed a sudden break before getting back to him, which was shorten only because of the latest sequence of events.

He shields himself through joined arms, breathing deeply through his nose to calm himself.

"I was about to propose to you, back in Paris.” he almost hesitates to go on as Stiles’ eyes grow bigger, “I didn’t know until the last moment how I’m gonna react, to be honest. But I never imagined I’d - “

“ - You…” Stiles’ voice came choked, and it is not clear to Derek whether it is out of a good reason or not, “You tried to ask me- And then - “

Stiles blurts out in laugh then, and as much as Derek’s insecurity tries to convince him to go bury himself somewhere - because that is what he has always known would be Stiles’ reaction, and what an irony he still got it after all this - but he had to be much more oblivious to not notice how it is a laugh of  _ relief _ , of releasing out a lot of things he probably ate himself with.

He does not know how to react, though, so he just waits until Stiles calms himself down, at least enough to be able to look at him straight again.

“I can’t believe you wanted to do it in Paris, you fucking  _ sap _ . I didn’t even know you were the type to do that sort of thing, like,   _ marriage,  _ let alone not to just talk it out and go sign some papers- but I guess with all those wooing presents you brought me, I couldn’t expect anything else.”

Derek gave him a questioning look. “You have to be a  _ type _ of a person to do those things? Isn’t it what all couples do?”

Stiles blinks at him, then his eyes are widen with realization. “Don’t tell me you - “

Stiles grabs his hands at of the defensive pose they combined together, then holds his wrists firmly, as if he asks him to be a little more open for him, even if it means being.

The struggle between his trust for Stiles and his instincts to never let anyone put him in a vulnerable position almost reaps him from the inside, but Stiles’ thumbs circle on the inner part of his arms, and amazingly it helps him to relax enough to find his breath again. 

“That joke earlier?” Stiles starts, “I made it only because you doing romantic things was  _ ironic _ , not because I actually expect you to behave any differently than you used to. I  _ loved _ what we had, okay? I enjoyed any bit of it. If you want to change then go ahead, but don’t do it to try making it any better than it already  _ is _ . Especially not because other’s expectations. Seriously, fuck them.”

Of course he would never make romantic gestures just because other think it is wrong to not do so, but he has truly thought it was the best for Stiles.

He did not really have the right to decide what Stiles wanted without confirming with the person himself, now that he thinks of it; he even more hated how reviled he felt, now that he knows he does not have to continue with failed attempts. 

But Stiles’ bright, brilliant eyes smile at him, assure him more than anything, and somehow hr can only think of Stiles giving up on his part for Derek’s own benefit. He always was better than him in looking on the bigger picture, not only worry about the other’s needs but being able to examine just  _ what _ they were.

Derek still has a lot to learn, but he will take the chance to try. Stiles was too precious to lose again because stupidly thinking for his own good without letting him have a say.

And Stiles’ look, which does not leave his own, ensures him that he is willing, for whatever reason, to do just the same for him, too. He found him to be  _ enough _ .

Derek feels his heart swelling just to be able to contain the love in him for the other, which he could never imagine could get any bigger. He huffs, ducking his head.

“By the way, next time you try to propose- if you still want to make it big, then try doing it in a cooler place. Like in an amusement park or something.” Stiles’ hands, which moved excitedly in the air, are now comically frozen in weird movements as he thinks again of what he has just said, “No, don't do it in an amusement park because I already suggest that. But surprise me," he finally nods.

Derek's heart misses a beat. 

_ Next time.  _ Stiles expects there to be a _next_ time.

He would be too shock to take anything of Stiles’ talk, if he did not suddenly mentioned his will to meet between Derek and his Father first.

“I know it’ll be hard to have time for it, but he will literally go mad if he doesn’t see the only guy in the world who could take almost two straight hours of me babbling about Star Wars and anything else that pops to my head. And don’t dare to get away of this, ‘cause if you remember he’s a Sheriff, and a good one. He’ll find you, spy or not.”

Derek does not know why he is so surprised that Stiles told his father about them- after all, it is only to be expected if during those couple of years Stiles was asked about any possible spouse. But even while spending so much time together off of the work, it is still hards for him to capture just how much he is a part of Stiles’ life now. 

Stiles talked about his father a couple of times, even showed him one picture of the man snoring on the couch that he will probably not be delight to find out Stiles has taken and shared- but he never met him before. The holidays were always the only part of the year where they broke contact for more than a day, and Derek refused to all of Stiles’ pleas to come back with him to his “ _ old man _ ”’s place since he took that time to visit his uncle.

Obviously there was also the part in him that refused to celebrate anything that was not next to a table surrounding by his family, but that was another thing.

But he can do it for Stiles; at least he did not say it has to be during the holidays.

Derek smirks at Stiles. “Maybe if it’s only me, but not if I have a good Hacker to help me.”

Stiles raises his brows. “You better be careful, asking me to go behind my Dad’s back. Remember that at the same level I can always use my skills against  _ you _ .”

“I’ll be surprised if you won’t.”

Stiles snorts, then blinks his eyes open a little wider than before- a motion Derek has learnt well enough to recognize as Stiles’ losing his train of thoughts.

“Oh, yeah, I heard there’s this new film now,  _ Burn Notice _ or something, about a burned Agent that his organization wants to delete any single detail about him. His girlfriend is even a Hacker too! Dude, we  _ have _ to go watch it. I think we both deserve some laugh after all this shit."

"By  _ laugh _ you mean you being bored and whining about it out loud, and if we don't get kicked out by this point, then you make me making out with you as noisy as possible."

Stiles’ smile is impossibly wide. “Just like old times.”

Only better, Derek completes him in his mind.

And that is when Derek knows that he may not have a house to leave, but, if he is lucky- he will always have a home to return to.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on Tumblr: [HeavenSentGohansRage](http://heavensentgohansrage.tumblr.com/)


End file.
